I’m back. In more ways than one. It’s been a rollercoaster getting here but I’m me. I’m different in many ways and I’m enjoying discovering who ‘me’ is these days. I stopped blogging when I went back to work last year. I blamed juggling my very demanding job and a baby single handedly. I also felt that I no longer needed the therapetic nature of blogging. It served a purpose at a time when my head and emotions were all over the place and it helped me rationalise the craziness of my unexpected single parenthood. My stopping also co-incided with my embarking on a new relationship. He was Mr Rebound and now a thing of the past and also served a purpose. He was also time consuming and made me happy at the time so blogging faded into a thing of the past……But during my sabatical I also got into some bad habits…. too numerous to mention: eating and drinking too much, feeling guilty so faddy dieting and becoming a bit obsessed with dating ridiculous people through a well known dating website and gotten slack with my daughter’s sleeping habits. But the worst bad habit was giving up writing. Okay, so I dont need to spew out my emotions about my divorce and single parenthood but I do need to chronicle my daughter’s wonder and delight: times which I will never get back and remember as clearly as when I read about them. Essentially, I’d become lazy and lost focus.
My sister came up to see me last weekend. She didnt have to say much. She’s my big sis. “Just stop” was sufficient enough. I listened. It was only last weekend so I it’s a very new leaf but I like my new habits of healthy eating, living and fitness. She busted my buns with ‘Shaun T’s T25’ Fitness DVD and it’s now part of my new and better habits. I’m also no longer focussing on a new relationship but focussing on the ones I’ve got and to write again. I’m enjoying it as I type and I think I’m alright at it!
I also remembered that I set myself goals when the ‘Bombshell’ of my now ex-husband’s affair hit and one was to write a children’s book as I discovered a passion for writing. Well, Im not so lazy that I haven’t written it. But I finsihed it ages ago. My daughter is obsessed with books so I’ve done enough research to know it’s good. What I’ve become lazy on is working on how to publish it. Obviously, it needs illustrations but I have a friend who is interested in that so it’s a start…….I just need to keep FOCUS.